Thursday, February 4, 2021

I Am Grateful

 Gratitude is like a food group. It is essential for being alive. -- Henry Winkler

I just wanted to ‘meet’ Fonzie from Happy Days. I already knew that I LOVED Henry Winkler…. I’ve liked him for SEVERAL years now. But WHY did it take me at least over one DECADE to FINALLY ‘meet’ Fonzie?! I do not think that I’ll EVER know the ANSWER to that question. I already KNEW who Fonzie was, because…. Well…. The Fonz is a LEGENDARY character. Agreed? I just had not ‘met’ Fonzie. So, it was one of my 2021 New Year’s Resolutions, {I am not kidding}, to ‘meet’ Fonzie. What do I think about him? Whoa. Fonzie CHARMED me from episode one WITHOUT EVEN SAYING A SINGLE WORD. I have FALLEN in LOVE with him, with his HEART of GOLD, with his VALUES, with his MORALS. Now, THAT was to be expected. Why? Because I AM, after all, CURSED to be FEMALE. Amen, women? What I absolutely did NOT expect was, as I eventually ‘got to know’ Henry Winkler through interviews, articles, and YouTube videos, {from very recent years}, Henry Winkler would somehow CHALLENGE me to seek, find, and choose GRATITUDE. Aaaaayyyyy…. All I wanted to do was ‘meet’ Fonzie!! Is THAT too much to ASK?! Huh?! Well, IS it?! So now, one of my 2021 New Year’s Resolutions, apparently, is to seek, find, and choose GRATITUDE…. Yes, during an ongoing global Coronavirus pandemic, appropriately enough. Thank-you, Henry Winkler…. Well, I must admit, THAT New Year’s Resolution is MUCH more PROFOUND than finally ‘meeting’ Fonzie…. Peace and Love, Mary Lou

P.S. One of the many blessings that I am grateful for is Rose. Ah, my Beagle/German Shepherd mix, my second dog, my Baby Girl. Since Rose is dead and now resides at The Rainbow Bridge, I am ETERNALLY grateful for her….

Edited by Kara Kent!!

I am grateful for years of memories;

‘Cause I became your Mama when you chose me;

I am grateful for the happy memories;

As you sat on my bed, keeping me company;

I am grateful, Rose, for several memories;

That I captured by taking pictures and selfies;

I am grateful, Babe, for our memories;

And baking literally countless dog cookies;

I am grateful for years of memories;

‘Cause I became your Mama when you chose me.

Friday, January 1, 2021

God Winks And Signs

2020. As a writer, if I can come up with ONE WORD to describe that unprecedented year, it would be ‘inconceivable’. I remember looking at pictures Online of images that seemed like they were straight from some Hollywood disaster movie. For, like, twain weeks into the deadly Coronavirus global pandemic, I felt nothing but utter shock. I was unproductive as an artist, and I did not write ANYTHING. Question…. Can you, Blogging Friends, Readers, and Followers think of something POSITIVE that happened during 2020? For me? During a seemingly NEVER-ENDING year when I had to euthanize my Beautifully Unique Beagle/German Shepherd mix, Rose, on June 15th, {and then obviously walk through grief’s journey}, something POSITIVE that happened to me during 2020 was the birth of my baby niece, ‘Ruby’!! Now it is your turn. Please leave your something POSITIVE that happened during 2020 in the comments. After I got over my initial shock from COVID-19, {for the most part}, I wrote what would end up being SEVERAL poems about Rose!! One of my New Year’s Resolutions is to ‘publish’ Blog posts more frequently, while also allowing myself some grace for disappearing whenever I feel like it. Happy 2021!! Peace and Love, Mary Lou

Edited by Kara Kent!!

I frequently say: ‘2020 sucks’;

So you, Baby, sent downy-feathered ducks;

Was this a God Wink from Doggy Heaven….

How many signs have you sent, eleven?

I frequently say: ‘2020 sucks’;

So you sent a bat, and ‘she’ wished me luck;

Was this your God Wink from The Beyond….

With me, Babe, is it how we correspond?

I frequently say: ‘2020 sucks’;

So you sent a heron, and I’m awestruck;

Was this your sign from The Afterlife….

A Place, Rose, where there is no strife?

I frequently say: ‘2020 sucks’;

So you sent geese flying, honking amok;

Was this a God Wink from The Rainbow Bridge….

Which is just my, {this Mutt Mom’s}, privilege?

Thursday, November 26, 2020

Mama Loves

Twenty years. For the first time in two decades, I am celebrating Thanksgiving, {and the Christmas season}, sans sharing it with a living dog. For the first time since 2010, Rose will NOT be pacing, scratching on her Uncle Michael’s securely closed bedroom door, and barking loudly at me, {as my Mom cuts turkey in our kitchen}, while I simultaneously try to watch television in Michael’s bedroom, and I repeatedly tell Rose: ‘Nothin’ I can do about it. I know you want some turkey. You’ll get some. Don’t you always? Nothin’ I can do about it.’ The holiday season, {especially my first one}, without either Shadow or Rose is always very emotionally hard on me. But, I will try to count my blessings on this Thanksgiving Day, not my losses. Because truth be told? I shared twenty Thanksgiving holidays with two Beautifully Unique mixed breed dogs, {Shadow and Rose}, during what feels like two completely different lives. And even though I am missing Rose very bad right now? I have been blessed. I wrote all three of these poems before Shadow and Rose were euthanized. Happy Thanksgiving!! Peace and Love, Mary Lou

Edited by Kara Kent!!

{My ‘love poem’ to Shadow}

Mama loves your German Shepherd ears;

Which are loyal and very sincere;

Plus that beautiful ‘blond’ fur;

From the Golden Retriever;

Mama loves those German Shepherd eyes;

A deep brown which never criticize;

Plus that pink Golden Retriever nose;

You were born special and duly so!!

*****

Edited by Kara Kent!!

{My original ‘love poem’ to Rose}

Mama loves your big, light brown, Beagle eyes;

They are expressive, so playful, and sly;

Mama loves that German Shepherd body;

Which neighbors could determine before me;

Mama loves those soft, floppy, Beagle ears;

You are special to me, is that not clear?

*****

Edited by Kara Kent!!

{My new ‘love poem’ to Rose}

Mama loves your floppy Beagle ears;

They are velvet-soft, like plush reindeer;

Mama loves your German Shepherd body;

Although you are a guess, my mystery;

Mama loves your brown and round Beagle eyes;

Those eye shadow-like black rings, I don’t despise;

Mama loves your German Shepherd markings;

With their dual black and brown colorings;

Though the Beagle within you is strong, not weak;

You’re special, and Beautifully Unique!! 

Thursday, November 5, 2020

Completely Empty, But Not Vacant At All

A red-colored Christmas box. It is full of decorations that I display in my little bedroom every single year. And this Christmas box also contains memories. A memory of Shadow, {she was my first dog, who died and travelled toward The Rainbow Bridge on June 15th, 2010}, a memory of Yoda, {he was my second cat who disappeared when I was fifteen years old}, and multiple memories of Rose. Inside this Christmas box is Rose’s red-colored holiday bandana that she got from PetsMart several years ago after a routine toenail clipping. This silk-like bandana has white-colored reindeer, green-colored hearts, and white-colored snowflakes printed on it. I have seven adorable pictures, {two of which she barked at me}, with this bandana around Rose’s neck!! But she only wore it once. I always use Rose’s bandana as a makeshift ‘doily’ in my bedroom. I have been doing that for several years. Inside this Christmas box is also a mug which says: ‘Santa’s spoiled dog’ on it. My Grandparents gave me that cup several years ago. If memory serves me right? When I received that mug, Rose was my living dog, not Shadow. I display it in my bedroom. I only drank out of that mug once. Last, but not least, inside this Christmas box, is Rose’s soft red and white-colored stocking. You know what? I have spent ten Christmas mornings pulling dog treats and toys out of that stocking for an excitable Rose. Now, it hangs on my bedroom wall, ‘completely empty, but not vacant at all’. I knew that opening this red-colored Christmas box as I decorated was going to feel emotional…. Peace and Love, Mary Lou

Edited by Kara Kent!!

Your soft red and white stocking hangs on my wall;

It’s completely empty, but not vacant at all;

Because your stocking is full of memories;

Like plush squeaky toys, and dog treats with bacon/cheese!!

Together, we had ten Christmas celebrations;

All of which, Baby, were special occasions;

In 2019, you’d been aging sans warning;

I knew this would be our last Christmas morning;

Yes, I predicted it, as though I’m a psychic;

‘Cause I felt your demise like an eccentric;

Rose, do you remember our last Christmas Day?

I bought nine dog treats, Babe, I got carried away!!

As resulted, Shadow’s stocking needed borrowed;

Because I knew that you might not see tomorrow;

Your soft red and white stocking hangs on my wall;

It’s completely empty, but not vacant at all….

Thursday, October 15, 2020

My Love Is Boundless

 Its just a thing. That was what I mentally told myself, {over and over and over}, when I lost my ‘REMEMBER’ necklace. Its just a thing. So I lied to myself. After all, I just lost a necklace, not Rose. Honestly? I do not get nearly as attached to material things as I used to before Rose was euthanized. So why did losing my ‘REMEMBER’ necklace make me feel like crying? If it’s just a thing. So why did I find myself searching Online, {Amazon, particularly}, for a replacement of my ‘REMEMBER’ necklace, {which was unsuccessful}? If it’s just a thing. So why did I retrace my steps, {over and over and over}, looking for my lost ‘REMEMBER’ necklace until I successfully found the piece of jewelry? Because it is NOT just a thing, that’s why. I have had my ‘REMEMBER’ necklace since Shadow was euthanized on June 15th, 2010. Yes, yes…. I have had my ‘REMEMBER’ necklace for over ten years. I’ve worn it to bed, in the shower, {only once, because I forgot to take the necklace off}, I have worn it while sweating when I’m dancing. See? It is NOT just a thing. By the way? That ‘REMEMBER’ necklace was also a gift from my Aunt and my cousin after Shadow died. It is NOT just a thing. Peace and Love, Mary Lou

--Part Five--

On my necklace, ‘REMEMBER’ is engraved;

Through grief’s journeys, it’s helped me to be brave;

My Rose, I will remember June fifteenth;

It’s a special date, you know what I mean?

I will remember the ‘dog mom’ necklace;

I wore because my love is boundless;

I will remember that The Rainbow Bridge;

Won’t make you not mine…. What a privilege….

I will remember how death won’t stop me;

From being your Mom eternally!!

Thursday, October 1, 2020

Gotcha Day

This poem is about September 21st, 2010, {the day when I adopted Rose}. I composed it before she died, which is one of the few poems that I wrote when Baby Girl was still alive. Peace and Love, Mary Lou

Edited by Kara Kent!!

Some things in Life can predict the future;

And they will determine the whole picture;

When your adoption papers were signed;

And Rose, you eternally became mine;

Some things in Life predicted the future;

And they did determine the whole picture;

Because ‘Beagles’ can be escape artists;

Your cage was opened, you ran for it;

Some things in Life predicted the future;

And they did determine the whole picture;

I brought home a ‘doggie bag’, if you will;

Balls caused fear, and the rope chew did not thrill;

I got a ‘doggie bag’, {pun intended};

But, you loved the treats, they were meat-scented!!

Some things in Life can predict the future;

And they will determine the whole picture.

This poem expresses my complex emotions, feelings, and thoughts leading up to Rose’s tenth Gotcha Day last week on 9-21, {her first at The Rainbow Bridge}. Apparently, loss can really mess with this grieving Mutt Mom’s broken heart, bleeding soul. Peace and Love, Mary Lou

 Edited by Kara Kent!! 

Rose, it is your tenth Gotcha Day;

When I adopted you as a stray;

Babe…. You’re supposed to be here;

And celebrate with me ten years;

I possessed a plan that I conceived;

It did not include being bereaved;

I was going to bake you cookies;

Like always, because I’m no rookie;

Babe…. You’re supposed to be on Earth;

I thought we would have twelve year’s worth;

This, this is my broken heart crying;

And, through grief, my bleeding soul sighing;

Babe…. I wish that you were here;

But God planned each second, each year;

The Lord had your every breath;

Preordained from birth, to Life, to death;

Rose, it is your first Gotcha Day;

At The Rainbow Bridge, worlds away….

This poem expresses me trying very hard to be emotionally resilient. Peace and love, Mary Lou

Edited by Kara Kent!!

Rose Elizabeth, do you remember….

Girl, the 21st of September?

You made me a Hound Dog Mom on this date;

My first, {and my last}, hound, my dog soul-mate;

Yes, yes…. You were my one and only;

For nine years, I was not lonely;

You were a mutt, but still all ‘Beagle’;

Your hound dog appearance looked regal;

Rose Elizabeth, do you remember….

Girl, the 21st of September?

Your adoption papers were signed;

And you, you eternally became mine;

‘Beagles’ are known as escape artists;

Your cage opened, you ran for it;

Yes, yes, I wholeheartedly remember….

Baby, the 21st of September!!

Thursday, September 17, 2020

The Beauty That I Felt

A month of firsts without Rose. That has been September for me. I love firsts, {especially when they are positive}, like Rose’s first Christmas, {December 25th, 2010}, or Rose’s first Gotcha Day, {September 21st, 2011}. But firsts without Rose, {or Shadow before her}, are heartbreaking. This has been a month of firsts without Rose. On September 15th, Rose had been dead, {and exploring The Rainbow Bridge}, for three LONG months. On September 16th, my brother participated in virtual rhythm and drum class, {oh, the coronavirus/2020}, a day when I would have spent baking Rose dog cookies during his class. On September 21st, it’ll be Baby Girl’s tenth Gotcha Day, {I imagine that anniversary will be emotionally hard for me}, also known as Rose’s first Gotcha Day at The Rainbow Bridge. My nieces, ‘Amethyst’, ‘Opal’, ‘Ruby’, and nephew, ‘Capricorn’ kept me preoccupied, {what blessed distractions}, on September 15th. I danced to Bruce Springsteen, {Born In The USA}, on September 16th, {during my brother’s virtual rhythm and drum class}. Please pray for me on September 21st…. Peace and Love, Mary Lou

Edited by Kara Kent!!

--Part Four--

On my necklace, ‘REMEMBER’ is engraved;

Through grief’s journeys, it’s helped me to be brave;

My Rose, I will remember June fifteenth;

It’s a special date, you know what I mean?

I will remember I did not expect;

The beauty that I felt to take effect;

I will remember being quite present;

As you died, and left on my heart paw prints;

I will remember scratching your throat;

As I felt that velvet-soft fur coat;

I will remember, Babe, how you ‘smiled’;

Did you know those legs will run through miles?