“Law-Breakin’, Rule-Breakin’ Elf”

{This is a conversation that I had with my nine-year old second cousin—and her Mama, Teira—on Christmas Eve….}

“{Kids} aren’t supposed to touch The Elf on the Shelf, but {my five-year old niece, Opal} loves playing with {Sweet Tooth}, so he’s a rebel!!” I said.

“Yeah, I accidentally touched {Trixie}, so we’re a little worried that {our gender neutral Elf on the Shelf} won’t make it back to the North Pole tonight….” said Teira.

“If I remember correctly, the book did not say that grownups can’t touch Elves on the Shelf,” I stated, “It said that children can’t touch him {or them}!!” I said.

“See?” Teira said to her fretting little girl, “{Trixie is} fine!!”

“I read somewhere Online that if {children} touch The Elf on the Shelf, then cinnamon will {bring back} their magic!!” I told my second cousin, “I don’t know if that means lay the elf in cinnamon, or…. That’d be kinda messy!! But {I read that} cinnamon works!!”

So by now, you have ‘met’ Sweet Tooth, my chocolate addicted, and sugar-obsessed Elf on the Shelf!! {Read previous poem!!} When I mentioned that Sweet Tooth has an incredibly huge personality for a little guy…. Well…. I will let Volume Two of my poems about Sweet Tooth explain!! Peace out, Mary Lou

P.S. For those who do not celebrate Christmas, happy Hanukah {which ended on December 10^th}, happy Winter Solstice {which occurred on December 21^st}, happy Kwanzaa, and, of course, happy New Year!!

Note…. I had a plan. I was going to have this poem written—and posted—on Christmas Day. But I struggled with cosmic Writer’s Block!! Needless to say, Volume Two of my poems about Sweet Tooth was not lifting up off of the ground!! Then, on Christmas morning, I awoke at an ungodly hour with excitement within my heart, chocolate within my system, and the first verse within my soul!! I had a liftoff!! It took me three days—apparently, my Creative Powers work best in the mornings when I am composing poems—who knew?

“Law-Breakin’, Rule-Breakin’ Elf”

Written by Mary Lou…. Edited by Kara Kent!!

There are important, and strict, laws;

Which were written by Santa Claus;

If I’m a North Pole citizen;

Then I can’t be touched by children;

Or I will lose all my magic;

And I can’t return to St. Nick;

But Opal loves playing with me;

She’s touched my hat, arms, and belly;

I am a law-breakin’, biker jacket-wearin’, motorcycle-ridin’ rebel!!

These are particular rules;

That I was taught in Elf School;

I can’t speak to anybody;

Not Opal, not little Bobby;

But these are children who seem nice;

I gave Opal some good advice;

‘Obey Mom and Dad on one take’;

Do not be ‘bad for badness sake’;

I am a rule-breakin’, biker jacket-wearin’, motorcycle-ridin’ rebel!!

Yes, there are significant laws;

Which were written by Santa Claus;

Christmas Eve, I can’t be here;

To ‘the Boss’, I reappear;

In Mary’s bedroom, I will stay;

And stay until New Year’s Day;

To the North Pole, I can’t go back;

I’ve been shunned from my Scout Elf pack;

I am a law-breakin’, rule-breakin’, biker jacket-wearin’, motorcycle-ridin’ rebel!!

“Sweet Tooth”

After seeing an Elf on the Shelf at a local antique shop last year {and wanting him, but talking myself out of it}, I caved, and I bought an Elf on the Shelf this Christmas!! His name is Sweet Tooth {although my youngest brother, Michael—who has Down syndrome—refers to him as Elvis, because that was what I originally planned to call him}!! Why did I name my Elf on the Shelf Sweet Tooth? Because, let's face it…. Nearly everybody possesses a cosmic sweet tooth during Christmastime!! Cookies!! Candy!! The chocolate molds in an advent calendar!! Also, I had just watched Elf before ‘adopting’ Sweet Tooth {well…. I have not registered my elf Online}, and Buddy possessed a cosmic sweet tooth!! ‘Is there sugar in syrup? I love sugar!’…. Sweet Tooth is, like, the most adorable ‘little person’ with his impish smile, his watchful cheery blue eyes, and his rosy cheeks!! He actually has an incredibly huge personality for a little guy!! Happy Christmas Eve!! Peace out, Mary Lou

PS. For those who do not celebrate Christmas, happy Hanukah, happy Winter Solstice, and happy Kwanzaa!!

“Sweet Tooth”

Written by Mary Lou…. Edited by Kara Kent!!

I tell Santa Claus who’s naughty or nice;

But I have one bad, yet important, vice;

I love sugar, that is so not an act;

I stole your almond bark, it’s a fact;

Don’t let my cheery blue eyes fool you;

I licked your candy cane, it is true;

Don’t let my impish smile fool you;

I love chocolate crinkle cookies, I do;

No, don’t let my rosy cheeks fool you;

Yes, I have an addiction through and through;

I love all Christmas cookies, that’s the truth;

For I’m an elf, and my name is Sweet Tooth!!

I am here to spread some Christmas Spirit;

I ate the advent calendar’s chocolates;

Ah, I love fudge, peppermint bark, toffee….

Rich steaming hot chocolate is my coffee;

Cookies, sugar, candy, what do I care;

Give me peanut clusters, I’ll be there;

Molasses cookies, molasses cookies;

Give me, give me, give me, give me, give me;

I know that ‘Christmas calories don’t count’;

So, I’ll stay slim, my pounds will not mount;

I love all Christmas candy, that’s the truth;

For I’m an elf, and my name is Sweet Tooth!!